Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, babes and oldies... in fact everyone (except those unwilling to splash the cash... or who are currently disabled): 'Cambridge on Ice' has, at long last, returned for its fourth year, offering skaters and merry-makers a winter wonderland right here on our very own Parker's Piece.
From Saturday 20th November until Sunday 2nd January, what could be more festive or fun than an £8.95 session spent gliding with friends and family under the twinkling fairylights and magical purple glow of this beautiful outdoor rink? Falling into both of the above categories of exclusion from such frolics, I can think of a number of alternative ways in which I'd prefer to (am resigned to having to) spend my time. But let's not be a Scrooge.
No, the two-week buzz of anticipatory excitement surrounding the erection of Cambridge on Ice will finally climax tomorrow, when the rink opens its doors to what will hopefully be a very satisfied public. I look forward to hearing screams of delight reverberating through the air, and to witnessing a flurry of exilharation as ecstatic kiddies and amorous couples take to the ice.
And if you're really old or really young, a) unlucky for you, and b) fear not: on Mondays and Tuesdays between 9 and 11am, the rink will be reserved for Parent & Toddler and Silver Skater sessions. At least I assume 'Silver Skater' refers to the elderly, as opposed to a more literal allusion to the city's rich and ostentatious, whose hard work has earned them not only high-paid jobs, but also the right to hassle-free, quiet skating. Either way, there'll be no riff-raff admitted during these times.
For those who like to follow who's who on the Oscar/Emmy/Bafta/Brit circuit, it may be of interest to you that Cambridge on Ice has been named a winner in the 2010 Cambridge 'Way To Be' awards, in recognition of their outstanding service and accessibility for disabled customers. They don't specify how on earth this accolade comes into play for the execution of a recreational activity almost entirely reliant on an able body. But who knows, perhaps every measure possible has been taken to make the rink a danger-free, more friendly and all-inclusive place: ice zimmer-frames, crampon-crutches, speed-bumps... grit?
For fear of a repeat of the shambolic dealings with last year's 'treacherous conditions', I wouldn't be surprised if the country were just sprinkling the stuff indiscriminately, ensuring no-one falls flat (on their face) this time round, regardless of whether the ice is a menacing force of nature, or a ludicrously priced fun-fest. It's a safer GB that counts, folks.
Or maybe they just got the prize because there's a ramp leading up to the cafe. So what if it's £4 a coffee and a sobering reminder that whilst physical fun is out of the question for me for 6 more weeks, the rest of the city is having jolly folly on ice?! After spending 3 minutes in veritable torment while stuck in a broken lift today, hand on my heart I can say: if it's easy access: fantastic, I'm there.
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